She bangs!

I am not a fan of bangs until recently I was contemplating on having one. I couldn't even remember when did I last had it. But the fondest was in Kindergarten.
Some months ago, I was undecided on the haircut I want to have since I'm just planning to grow it longer. Just to appease me longing for change, I cut it by myself which was more liberating than I expected. What prompted everything was a chat with my mom and aunt the other day. My aunt, who has a salon in her house, had bangs and was curious how did she cut it. She taught it via Skype and I was so eager to try it. At first, I was having second thoughts because I'm not really sure how will I look in it and will it fit me? But, maybe the urge was just too strong that I just took out the scissors from the cabinet and did it in less than three minutes yesterday! I am happy with how i cut it. It wasn't perfect and good thing the length is just fine.

Peter doesn't really like it. He likes my hair just single length, down and simple. But later on, he was just smiling at me and maybe he's just happy for the success of my plan! Haha...What's even funnier was Jakob couldn't get off his eyes off me and smiling all the while with my new haircut. It made me feel funny. Maybe, he thinks it looked funny. Haha! But I like the stare he gave me yesterday. Maybe, he was trying to figure whether it's still his mommy or a nanny!! Haha....But whatever it is, the same bangs gave me a feeling of relief as Jakob was completely fine the whole weekend (and his disease wasn't pharyngitis, Peter found out it's Roseola Infantum or 3-day Fever). The bangs was a sign of the end of a week-long struggle with my sick son. And a great feeling to look forward for the coming week. I don't know what's coming but I am just excited with how things are going to turn out this week, with my new bangs. I guess, I just needed something new. And the bangs is taking me through it. I guess, the bangs is just a way to make me enjoy my life as I take it each day as it comes.

Jakob got sick

Wednesday afternoon when I felt from instinct that Jakob's fever isn't just about teething. I had a speculation that something else is bothering him. That's why it really pays to teach your toddler about body parts so you'll have an idea where he might be having problems or why he's fussy. I thought it could be ear infection, or sore throat or tummy ache. But what's puzzling about Jakob's fever is that he shows no other signs of possible infection. No vomiting, no colds or cough. So, at dinner time, he started getting really fussy. He couldn't get a good nap as he wakes up every 10 minutes and cry. I told Peter that there might be something else. But Peter said it's his teeth. So around ten in the evening, I decided to check his temperature again and it just went to 105F. I wasn't comfortable. I just don't want to be left alone when things got worse. And I don't want to wait for worse. So at eleven in the evening, we were at the Emergency Room to have Jakob checked. Good thing, it didn't take us a long while to be there. We were attended promptly. I was glad. The doctor came right away and checked his ears but found nothing. But when he checked Jakob's throat, he saw that red big throat which may be causing the high fever and lack of appetite. I was a bit relieved that there was a sign of something. Because a few weeks ago, a distant relative of ours who has a one year old girl had high fever too and was suspected to have leukemia. But good thing (thank God), it wasn't that. I didn't know what happened after but the fever went down and she was sent home.
In the midst of all these, I just felt how important it is to be with my son while he's growing. I felt I made a smart decision two years ago and decided to come to the US right away, and be with my husband. I just thought who would take care of Jakob if both me and Peter are working and can't just leave our jobs. So, I guess it's all a matter of balance. You get to lose some, and earn some. For me, I earned looking after my son and making sure he gets better. I hope he does, as the fever went down to 98.8 this morning.
I barely slept for the past three days, but it's so surprising that I don't feel that I need some sleep. There, I realized this is how it is to be a mother. You don't feel pain when you want to make sure your little one is alright. I also salute my husband for being there all the time given his very tight schedule. And always ready to do my favors in the middle of the night while Jakob is fussy or relentlessly crying.
I was talking to my mom last night and told her I wished she was here to help me out cause it's really hard being with a sick kid all by myself. I can't do much. I didn't even take a bath for two days! But, I appreciate the learning. I am grateful for the kind of support I have here. My husband, my sister-in-law who's always so willing to buy Jakob food and some stuff. I am just thankful.
Topping it all, I also learned that this time, I should know better. The copy of the table for proper medication and reducing fever is already in the fridge door. We found that that the fever medication we're giving Jakob is underdose that's why his fever is sky high. It's tough being a parent? Yeah, it is. I was wondering if I can still have one more. This is just a speck of the journey, I wonder how will I be and what I will write about when Jakob turns 18.

Yesterday's Showbiz News

I was out from blogging for a day to attend to my ailing son from teething. It's been bothering him since last weekend and he had a fever yesterday. He's got a little temperature now but I hope it will go away within the day as the tooth has ruptured already.
While all this is happening, I can't help but make a blog on what's happening with the Robin-Mariel issue which apparently was a head-spinning event as they have already tied the knot in a Muslim rite in India a little over a month ago (August 19, to be exact). It wasn't a shocker. For me, it was lame.
As I told my friend Karisma over the phone this morning, that I have this theory as to why all of a sudden (and to no avail), that Robin came announcing in ANC that, he and Mariel have made their vows already. Why ANC? Why Tina Muzon-Palma? (who we all know is not a showbiz host or scooper). I told my husband that my theory is this. Someone must've told or advised them that they can't play with the media. They can't play with people's minds. That sooner it's gonna hurt their careers real bad if they won't admit what really happened. It's not doing any good especially to Mariel who was reportedly having a silent war with friend and former co-host Toni G. While KC C was suddenly dragged into it when she gave that meaningful comment in The Buzz "that it's not important how many friends you have, as long they're true to you." Tabloid reporters are trying to attack that hot bullet when they wrote that Mariel questioned why KC earned herself a show when she's not as good as a host herself? It's showbiz. We don't know which is true, which is not, and up to what extent is real. But whatever it is, Mariel is on the verge of a losing end here. And that's what exactly I'm pointing out in my previous blog. That she should've waited. But I know that's beside the point now. What I think is rightful now is for her to go for an interview and have everything cleared once and for all. And Mariel has to pray hard that it's gonna do better after that interview. That her career will still be on the same light as where she left it. As for Robin, I don't care much. It just felt funny when Boy Abunda asked him about his feelings for Mariel after the marriage (this. I'm not so sure but the question went sort of this way). It's just funny that the question went as if it's Robin's first time to fall inlove and got married. Come on, it's his 2nd! With a lot of speculated relationships with other women in showbiz, in between. It's not new to him. It's just Mariel who's new.
I'm just making that classic "simangot" when I see these two people on tv. Let's end this blog with a good note. That's why I should now talk about how elated I was last night when I saw the premier episode of Glee this season. I am the proudest and happiest for Charice. That I didn't watch her on TFC or GMA, but I, in fact, watched her in FOX Channel in US. She has really made a long way and I know she worked hard for it. Yeah, she might be lucky. But there's an article I read recently that there are common things that lucky people do. First, they just know how to seize good opportunities. Second, a good mindset that they think of bad experiences aren't bad at all. That they're just learning from it. Charice must've mastered this two. And whatever she's doing with her life and career now are just paying off for the hardships she may have gone through. So, this one, is the real Cheers!! Not some silly publicity of relationships.

Pinoy Showbiz

Caution: You will never think I'm this nosy. Haha!

Weekend is not complete without me hooking up with "The Buzz" every Sunday in TFC. I've been a fan even in my busiest days when I used to work. It must be the "cheapness" (haha) of the scoops that I easily get by just watching but recently, I would imagine that I'm part of the show (haha). But kidding aside, I was late when I opened the tv and saw the last two major "shockers" they showed yesterday. The top ten showbiz "shockers" aren't usually shockers per se, but it's how Boy Abunda recorded that audio that makes it really a must-see scoop. I like Boy Abunda a lot. He's the epitome of a showbiz host that you will always respect. He's earned that integrity (like Ricky Lo), that when something comes out of his mouth (especially if it has something to do with Kris Aquino), it is, in fact, true. But a few months ago, I was a bit puzzled when Boy apologized to the people in Visayas when Kris couldn't make it due "marital problems." It just wasn't "boyish" Abunda who would do that. I was even making my point to my husband that Boy would be discreet and careful in saying those things. But because Boy is a very close friend to the Presidential sister, he was also obliged to be say that in public. And true enough, I think he mentioned how difficult it is for him to say it, a week or two after that incident. Fast forward to the recent showbiz news. I watched an episode of SNN just the other day and noticed that Boy kinda moved back about the news that Kris has a new "bff" by the person of the Vice Ganda. I see that Boy was handling it civilly on tv but there was something about his face. I may be wrong and maybe there's nothing to "scoop" about but I just believe that some things will never be the same again between him and Kris.
So much about Boy. I just miss my gay friends all the more when I see him on tv.
There were a couple of showbiz shockers when I opened the tv. There's this Mariel-Toni mysterious indifference. And the Robin-Mariel wedding in Baguio.
The Mariel-Toni issue is just one normal thing in showbiz I guess. It happens to anyone whether you're in showbiz or not. I just have this theory that Mariel's whirlwind decisions in everything (love and career) might be brought up by how competition goes in showbiz. Noticed that Mariel was left in Win na Win and E-Live, while her contemporaries, Bianca G (goes to SNN) and Toni G (goes to The Buzz). I don't know. I may be wrong again, but any person who's running her career so smoothly will feel left behind or even more than that if a movement like that happens. Oh, by the way, it's hard juggling everything like that when your boyfriend breaks up with you. I feel for Mariel because it happened to me, but in different sequence.
And here comes the Knight Robin rescuing her from demise. I may not know her personally but every woman knows these days how to value her career like it's everything she has. So, ok, it must be L-O-V-E. Fine. I respect that. But the confusing wedding ceremony is one heck of a public trick. It's a promotion to an upcoming show. They said they're not allowed to say things because everything is in progress. From the proposal in E-Live, to India, to Baguio and everything that will happen in next coming weeks is a promotion either for a movie or a show. And whatever's coming out soon, I don't buy it. Sorry. I used to like Mariel as a host. She's not irritatingly funny or "maarte". But her mere smile and smirk on tv these days makes me want to turn it off. All I can say is, it's not a good way to turn her career wheel. For me, she should've waited.

A Presidential Love Affair

I've been an avid fan of GMA and ABS-CBN news online. I don't know, I just have that habit of comparing how they line up the news. And today, my attention was suddenly caught by the status of the relationship between the President and Ms. Shalani. The news said that there was a rumor that they split up and later on denied by both parties.
I may have a bit of experience in love and relationships but I guess the things I went through before gave me strength and encouragement as to what I have become now. Or what me and my husband have become.
That's why the P-Noy-Shalani love affair will become one of the headlines in the next six years because everyone will always wonder what will happen or what they don't know, happened. For one, it's quite an extraordinary scenario being the girlfriend of the President. There's always prestige to it but at the end of the day, a woman would just want a man who will stand by her side.
I got the chance to see Shalani in an interview with Kris Aquino in The Buzz, just months or weeks before Kris left the show. And I just see myself in her. Her simple views and wants in a relationship. I feel for her. And I just can imagine how difficult it is for her being just behind all these things now. P-Noy faced with enormous problems in poverty, education, jobs, corruption and the countless issues the Philippines is facing. But I think Shalani can't deny the fact that still, she's a girlfriend and she needs time and attention...as much as P-Noy does. I just remember borrowing that line from Notting Hill when Julia Roberts said that she's an ordinary girl waiting for boy to love her. Aaawwww.....
But on a more serious note, it's just way beyond patience that you've got to have, dealing with the kind of relationship P-Noy and Shalani have. She looks like she's religious and I hope her faith will bring her to a happy ending she may be expecting (every woman wants one anyway).
Lastly, if there's any friendly advise I'll give Shalani. It would be this. Think of it as a long distance love affair. That the person you love is far away and that you don't have a single chance of being with him in your sadness or happiness. And I guess I'll just take that advise Peter gave me the first time we had that kind of relationship. He just said, never compare. Never compare the relationship we have, with that of others. And I took that seriously for seven years. That I was and still am happy despite the distance that separated us which become the force that binded us in the end. We were both busy with our careers and it prepared us well for a lifelong commitment after that seven years. Yes, it is hard and I believe that long-distance relationships isn't for everybody. Some people think of it as "out of sight, out of mind" thing but the others who would go for it think, "distance makes the heart grow fonder." But whatever it is (for Shalani), this is the best time to test this love. If it is yours, it will just come knocking at your door at the right time. If it is not, then it was never meant at all.

Cooking & Culture Thoughts before Sleeping

It's me time now. 10:40 in the evening and the boys just dozed off. I just finished taking a shower and here I am again, letting some thoughts out. The day went pretty great especially that Chicken Lettuce wrap I made for dinner. Peter adored it and that's the only thing I needed after I carefully worked out that recipe. I have loved cooking. I never thought I would. Cooking wasn't just me until I got married. But I would admit I don't have the most keen taste buds, but the palate seems to be improving when I moved to LA and tried different sorts of ingredients I never tried before (or never knew existed before).
I didn't grow up to a variety of ingredients. I've only known soy sauce, vinegar, sea salt and the black pepper that my father used to grind through a mortar and pestle. That one I grew up seeing mostly on the side of my father's family. Filipino cooking isn't about much of the ingredients I guess. It's the unity and the oneness of the family that goes with it. That's why I would agree with my husband that Filipino dish is hard to sell in the international market. We are lacking that "factor" when we present our dish internationally.
Come to think of it, I was just thinking about why Filipino dish is like that and I already had a million thoughts as to why up to now, we haven't really made it internationally as a cuisine. Probably it will all go back to our history and what have we become since then. It just saddens me sometimes that up to now we can't make a signature out of our roots as Filipinos. Just like Mexicans who are known for jalapenos. The Thai known for sweet and spicy with peanut-ty taste.
And I remember, I was watching the last 2 episodes of Top Chef D.C. and they were in Singapore to explore the dish there. I can still smell Singapore from the last time I visited in 2008. It is like Manila but a hundred times cleaner & more disciplined. I always think why we never came to that point. Singapore is even a fusion of many Asian countries. This one truth I believed from P-Noy. That the Philippines wasn't affected with the global recession because probably, we were not active internationally. I guess that's the whole point.
Thing is, we have a good history and the culture is rich because of the many foreign visitors we had in the past. We are always proud of our democracy but I'm not sure if we are living up to it. To the real meaning of being free. Because for me being free is having the right to choose what we think is best for us. Being free is free from the pains of the past. Being free is moving forward.
There are a couple of new Filipino food trucks in LA now and I think they're doing great which I'm happy about. What they're doing is a fusion of Filipino food matched with the culture of eating/dining in LA. And I'm a fan. It makes me feel closer to home while enjoying what this big city has to offer me.
And that signature ingredient we have, I guess it would have to be "calamansi"....A lot of Asian countries have it but I know that the Filipinos use it best. It's an aid to your marinade, could be a condiment or a juice! I was just lucky to have an Aunt who has calamansi plants in her backyard and we're getting for free. That's why whenever we have it, I never failed to make calamansi juice for Peter and to make that all-time favorite beef steak or "bistek" in Tagalog as we often call it.
I was just thinking that if we are to describe what do most Filipino food taste like? It would be sour and sweet. It just goes along well with the culture and the weather we have! Isn't it great?
I'm dozing off now. Next off tomorrow will be thoughts on the news in the Philippines.
Good night.

Today's Realization

I have always imagined myself putting the words in my head into a piece. Such as this. And for some reasons that I can't explain, I just searched this free site and signed up.
I have a lot of idle moments. I must have mastered my schedule everyday that I know how else can I squeeze in moments for myself while taking care of my soon-to-be 17 month old boy, Jakob. Since we can not engage in a good conversation "yet" then I guess or I may be reiterating that writing will be a good vice to start with, today.
So I'm a mom at age 30, now 31. Married at 29 and happily taking the role of a wife. But I'm a mom most of the time as my husband works 12 hours a day but spends really good and quality time during weekends.
My everyday looks like a woman waking up at 6am, just when my son wakes up. Cooks, have my son eat, clean, throw the garbage, check my facebook and keep myself updated with the news here and in the Philippines where I came from.
And this is where my blogs will mostly come from. I still feel that certain connection with the Philippines being two years away from the place I still call "home."
Let me begin with the shows I love, used to love and never loved.
By the way, my blog may be biased with other networks as we only have TFC. But I've been telling my husband that I want to try GMA as I heard that there's more to it....or maybe, it's an easy way to get rid of the TFC shows we've been watching for years. Yes, like any other people, we need choices to be entertained.
If there's any best "teleserye" in TFC today that other networks can not level with, that's Gretchen Barretto and Bea Alonzo's Magkaribal.  As a viewer, I have always felt that I am being led to a very nice journey from the pilot. Not to mention the production they've put up to make this really a must-see teleserye.
The plot is clean (so far) and characters are being handled in a more realistic way, except for the antagonistic exchanges between Victoria and Gelai. (Gelai to Victoria: "Sinungaling, desperada...ilusyonada.." )
Who would answer your boss that way? Or even way before that... when Manuel died. You wouldn't dare care about your boss's matters...personal matters at that. But maybe for the sake of living up to the name of the title "Magkaribal", that has to be put in the script, even if at times I feel uncomfortable when Gelai puts up some biting and sometimes, out-of-hand words to Victoria. It's no surprise that Gelai was fired and is now having a hard time looking for a job. Oh well, it's a soap opera! What do I expect? Can I not suspend my reality for 30 minutes and bite it! Hahaha
Anyway, the best part of this teleserye is the way things are going with Gelai and Louie AND Victoria and Louie. That I guess is the best part living up to the name, Magkaribal. That Louie is one hell of a liar! A typcial guy caught in between the love of two hot women! :-) And that love scene between Victoria and Louie?...that's really something (although one scene looked like Louie can't lift from that stand at E position). Bottom line is, the love scene between Victoria and Louie has never failed my expectations right from the start (remember that scened on the table? That was complete shocker! Which I loved haha).
I know there's more to come. I just hope this "serye" won't have a lousy ending (that of Agua Bendita and all the others that just wanted to put a period to the millions of comma they've placed everywhere). I hope there will be no bombs or suicide or those destructive endings we've seen in the past. I hope this one will be different.
Oh, and one last thing...I hope that when Victoria and Gelai find out they're sisters, I hope there will be a much more justified conflict. Not some out-of-this-world twist just because they have to keep running for the ratings. I know this is how their business goes, but you don't beg for the ratings when you know it's one heck of a good show. It's not what the viewers want sometimes, it's what the story calls for. And that's one reason why I watch it. Because I know this is something different from the ones I've seen before.